Have you ever noticed how you can say something to yourself that you would never say to someone you love?
I should be doing more.
Why can’t I get it together?
Everyone else seems to handle this better than I do.
I should have figured this out by now.
We say these things so casually that half the time we don’t even notice we’re doing it.
But imagine your best friend sitting across from you saying, “I’m exhausted. I’m trying. I feel like I can’t keep up.”
Would you look at her and say, Well, you really should be doing more?
Of course not.
You’d probably tell her to give herself a break.
Funny how we’re not always quite as generous with ourselves.
The Stuff We Say to Ourselves Adds Up
I’m not going to tell you to stand in front of the mirror every morning and announce that you’re unstoppable.
If that’s your thing, go for it.
But sometimes you don’t need a huge declaration.
You just need to catch the thought that’s making an already difficult day harder.
I’m so behind.
Okay. Behind according to whom?
I should be able to handle all of this.
Why?
Everyone needs something from me.
Maybe they do. But that doesn’t automatically mean you have to provide all of it.
Sometimes one different sentence is enough to interrupt the one you’ve been repeating all day.
Give Yourself Something Better to Look At
This is actually why I love putting words in places where you’ll stumble across them during your normal day.
Not inspirational speeches.
Just reminders.
Self-Doubt Is Loud. Be Louder.
Soft Heart. Sharp Boundaries.
You Can Be Soft and Still Say No.
You might see one while you’re brushing your teeth and not think much about it.
Then you have a day when you really need it.
And suddenly you read it differently.
That’s the idea behind the Me-First Mirror Clings. They’re not there to convince you that every day is wonderful.
They’re there to interrupt you for a second.
Especially when the voice in your own head could stand to be a little nicer.
And Sometimes You Need Somewhere to Put the Rest of It
Not every thought needs a comeback.
Some thoughts just need somewhere to go.
That’s one of the reasons I believe so much in writing things down.
You don’t have to be “a journal person.”
You don’t have to write three pages every morning or document your deepest thoughts while drinking tea in perfect silence.
Sometimes it’s one sentence.
Today was a lot.
That’s enough.
Sometimes you start with one sentence and realize there’s something underneath it you haven’t let yourself say yet.
That’s enough too.
I created Survivingd the Mess, the first book in the Simply All U guided journal series, for exactly that kind of person.
The person who has a lot going on and absolutely does not need journaling to become one more thing they’re supposed to do perfectly.
You open it.
You answer honestly.
You close it.
Come back when you’re ready.
Try Catching Yourself This Week
Not fixing yourself.
Not improving yourself.
Just catching yourself.
The next time you hear that little voice say:
You should have done more.
You’re falling behind.
Why can’t you handle this?
Stop for a second.
And ask:
Would I say this to my best friend?
If the answer is no, maybe you don’t deserve to hear it either.
You don’t have to replace it with something inspirational.
Just something a little more fair.
I’m tired.
I’m doing what I can.
This can wait.
I can say no.
I don’t have to figure everything out today.
That’s not pretending everything is okay.
That’s giving yourself the same grace you’d probably give someone else without even thinking about it.
And maybe it’s time some of that came back to you.
Permission to Be U.